4 Agreements - Healers of the Valley

Cover photo of the book The Four Agreements by Don RuizTHE FOUR AGREEMENTS

By Jade Joyce

According to Don Ruiz, the world is full of suffering.  We are hard on each other, but even harder on ourselves.  We are unfulfilled, unhappy, joyless.  Why is this?  We learned how to behave, what is acceptable and what is not, what to believe, and what is right or wrong.  None of this was taught to us by our choice.  We then use this belief system to criticize ourselves.  No wonder we feel powerlessly unhappy at times!

Everything we accept as "the way it is” is an agreement.  However, too many of these agreements hurt ourselves.  If we want a life of joy, we must break these old agreements that promote suffering and failure.  Therefore, we must create new agreements.  Luckily for us, Don Ruiz has done just that in breaking it down to Four Agreements aimed at helping us step into our personal power and break the dangerous cycle we are in.

The First Agreement:  Be Impeccable With Your Word

  • Say what you mean
  • Speak with integrity
  • Stop your internal negative self-talk
  • Refrain from gossiping

The Second Agreement:  Don’t Take Anything Personally

  • Nothing they think about you is really about you
  • Others see the world with different eyes
  • Everyone’s truth is their own
  • If someone gets mad at you, they’re dealing with their own issues

The Third Agreement:  Don’t Make Assumptions

  • Be aware
  • Ask questions
  • Communicate
  • Take action

The Fourth Agreement: Always Do Your Best

  • Let go of the past
  • Learn to say NO when you want and YES when you want

Don Ruiz points out that it won't be easy, and you'll need a strong will to make these new agreements, but when you succeed, you will transform your lives.

Jade Joyce is the founder of Wisdom Warrior, where she works as a transformational coach.  To learn more about Wisdom Warrior, click here.

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